You know what Hollywood?

/begin rant

You’re boring and no one likes you. I don’t even know what a Bradley Cooper is and Ryan Gosling looks like Macaulay Culkin so the answer is still no. Yes, so glad white people are still the most sexy people in La La Land. So glad that their teeth are straight and they grow the acceptable amount of facial hair.

Also, your movies are awful. I saw Take Shelter this weekend. It was great and it was actually an original screenplay. How…original. I also like Michael Shannon’s face. It has more personality than any of the people you tout as beautiful. Have other people heard of it? Are people talking about it? Well, not much but at least Jack and Jill is doing well. Everything else you’ve done this year has been overhyped. Here’s an idea: how about not putting out previews to your awful films a year and a half in advance and actually work on making a great movie.
Movies I saw this year in a theater: Super 8 - no. Nice action scenes but I hated all these kids. And I love kid gangs in movies (see Goonies, Stand By Me, Now and Then, Babysitters’ Club).
That Planet of the Apes thing - I’m tired of seeing serious James Franco. Who takes him seriously? Thanks for John Lithgow though!
Contagion and Bridesmaids - finally something right.
Also, surprisingly Source Code was good but I didn’t see it in theaters so you lose again Hollywood. I’m making it seem as though independent films don’t count but Another Earth was gorgeous and I’m glad I spent time seeing it.
You have failed in making me think this year would be good for movies with your snippets, exclusive trailers and alluring posters with that actor or actress wearing their fancy costume. Truth is, I forgot about more than half of those movies when release time came. And I will forget about the ones you are shoving down my throat now.

Robert De Niro, you don’t need the money that bad. Why you’ve chosen to be in New Year’s Eve (and some other questionable films these past few years) is beyond me. Sure Beaches and The Princess Diaries were good but this guy is like the Nicholas Sparks of directing. Just stop acting or just say no. Have some dignity man!

I still have these films I want to see this year (minus Take Shelter) but otherwise I despise you Hollywood. You are a spineless, egotistical, vacuous soul. You’ve always had the egotistical part but at least could make good movies. Go rehab yourself just like the rest of the starlets you use and throw away and come back with actual content worth viewing. I am just so sick of bad movies lately. I can’t be the only one who sees this right? Right?!

p.s. I don’t care about my punctuation right now. I’m planning a theater opening. (As soon as I pay off my student loan and then win a million dollars to do so)

/rant over