Finally got around to seeing Fish Tank. Really lovely, awesome movie. The dance scene at the end is probably one of the most iconic scenes I’ve ever seen in a while. There’s this really incredible essay in the booklet of the DVD which really inspires me to see more of Andrea Arnold’s work and her contemporaries. It refers a lot to Ken Loach and Alan Clarke who I’ve never heard of before but since I enjoy seeing a different side of England, I think I’ll check them out.

I feel like I needed this movie because there’s been a lot of uninteresting movies out lately. I’ve been fairly bored with television too. And then I feel very out-of-touch, like maybe there’s something wrong with me to not care or know anything. I guess all I need is a really good book and some Alice Donut. And Rihanna too.

Gah, I’m so lame. But who cares. Movie trailers, new albums…I’ll get to them when I can. Three years on, Fish Tank is still incredible. And Michael Fassbender is still around.

You know what Hollywood?

/begin rant

You’re boring and no one likes you. I don’t even know what a Bradley Cooper is and Ryan Gosling looks like Macaulay Culkin so the answer is still no. Yes, so glad white people are still the most sexy people in La La Land. So glad that their teeth are straight and they grow the acceptable amount of facial hair.

Also, your movies are awful. I saw Take Shelter this weekend. It was great and it was actually an original screenplay. How…original. I also like Michael Shannon’s face. It has more personality than any of the people you tout as beautiful. Have other people heard of it? Are people talking about it? Well, not much but at least Jack and Jill is doing well. Everything else you’ve done this year has been overhyped. Here’s an idea: how about not putting out previews to your awful films a year and a half in advance and actually work on making a great movie.
Movies I saw this year in a theater: Super 8 - no. Nice action scenes but I hated all these kids. And I love kid gangs in movies (see Goonies, Stand By Me, Now and Then, Babysitters’ Club).
That Planet of the Apes thing - I’m tired of seeing serious James Franco. Who takes him seriously? Thanks for John Lithgow though!
Contagion and Bridesmaids - finally something right.
Also, surprisingly Source Code was good but I didn’t see it in theaters so you lose again Hollywood. I’m making it seem as though independent films don’t count but Another Earth was gorgeous and I’m glad I spent time seeing it.
You have failed in making me think this year would be good for movies with your snippets, exclusive trailers and alluring posters with that actor or actress wearing their fancy costume. Truth is, I forgot about more than half of those movies when release time came. And I will forget about the ones you are shoving down my throat now.

Robert De Niro, you don’t need the money that bad. Why you’ve chosen to be in New Year’s Eve (and some other questionable films these past few years) is beyond me. Sure Beaches and The Princess Diaries were good but this guy is like the Nicholas Sparks of directing. Just stop acting or just say no. Have some dignity man!

I still have these films I want to see this year (minus Take Shelter) but otherwise I despise you Hollywood. You are a spineless, egotistical, vacuous soul. You’ve always had the egotistical part but at least could make good movies. Go rehab yourself just like the rest of the starlets you use and throw away and come back with actual content worth viewing. I am just so sick of bad movies lately. I can’t be the only one who sees this right? Right?!

p.s. I don’t care about my punctuation right now. I’m planning a theater opening. (As soon as I pay off my student loan and then win a million dollars to do so)

/rant over

Summer Plans:

So it’s almost here. Or it is here depending on when you feel it has arrived. Of course, summer comes early in South Texas because it’s about 100 degrees outside. So far I’ve purchased quite a few books, a hula hoop, and a half-pint of Blue Bell peaches and vanilla ice cream. I think these are my official purchases of summer. I have also gone on several long bike rides. In fact, I took my other Schwinn in for fixin’ up because it’s much lighter than Blue Betty. I’m excited to show off Big Red this summer! I have also been dancing and to a poetry slam with my fun friend Cat and we have plans to have a really exciting time while she is off from school.

Speaking of school, I may enroll in a writing course at Gemini Ink. With keeping up a blog, jotting in my journal, and making a zine, I feel like I have finally gained the confidence to participate. I did a creative writing course twice before and it was always so helpful but also scary to share at the end of each class. I think this entire summer will be about doing more creative things, building photo portfolios, and putting myself out there with the things I make. I even have a friend who is willing to let me practice portrait work on her. I’m excited. This summer will be about confidence building.

I also want to be a better big sister. I want her to do things that I didn’t take the opportunity to do when I was in high school. I feel like it’s the reason why I struggled with things so badly after graduation. I don’t think any of the schools I went to were my dream schools. And as well as my job is working out for me, I do wish I was doing something a little different. I was actually thinking this morning how thankful I am that my parents sent me to camp and on planes to Chicago by myself when I was young. I feel like it helped boost an independent spirit in me. I just wish I would have kept it up into high school. I wish I would have participated more and looked in the mirror and realized I was beautiful. It was such an awkward state of life but it was also fleeting. I shouldn’t have wasted that time. But instead of looking into the past, I have to be inspiring to others, especially to my younger sister.

There’s lots of good summer activities. Concerts, festivals, movie nights. I want to do lots of things. I want to go to Austin & Houston and ride my bike around those cities. And I want to go tubing down the Guadalupe River. I want to prepare for September also. I won’t be living with a housemate come then but I won’t be going back home either. I could travel for a little bit with all that I’ve saved up or get a small apartment for myself or even move out of the state. Everything is so up in the air when you don’t have anything to tie you down. I should feel blessed about that instead of being worried about what comes next.

Summer plans aren’t always about the things you have to do but the kind of person you have to become. I know I’ll sweat a lot down here in ol’ San Antone. Let’s just hope I sweat out some of the bad stuff that weighs me down as a person.

P.S. I pretty stoked about TCM’s Drive-In Double Features!